If you’ve been following along in the leader coaching process this month, you’ve probably learned a lot about yourself. Now it’s time to learn about others, particularly as they relate to you and your world. When you understand others’ behavioral strengths, weaknesses and their driving forces, it makes for a much smoother working environment. Part of being an effective leader is coaching others to success using social awareness and social regulation, two components of emotional intelligence.
Social Awareness: Use Empathy to Understand Others
In order to truly understand other people, you need to understand their experiences, thoughts, and feelings. Practicing empathy will put you in the shoes of others to gain greater understanding.
Put aside your viewpoint, and try to see things from the other person’s point of view. It helps you realize the intent and why they might be acting a certain way.
Look at driving forces. If you’ve started using assessments with your team, discuss their results with them. Seek to understand others’ motivators or behaviors for example.
Ask questions! A simple way to understand the other person is to ask questions that dig down to what they are really trying to communicate then practice active listening skills.
Social Regulation: Influencing Others
If social awareness is knowing how you affect others, social regulation is your ability to influence. This is done through learning to manage relationships and build networks.
Remember unique facts about others. Show interest in the stories they share. Jot notes in your “contacts” field in your phone.
Take notice when emotions are taking over an interaction. Diffuse tension or lessen the intensity by taking a break of agreeing to disagree.
If you have a miscommunication with a co-worker, take accountability quickly.
Demonstrate a curiosity about others and their well-being and ask them how you can help them.
Emotional Intelligence and You
No two people share the same thoughts, emotions or life experiences. Understanding others goes a long way to making environments psychologically safe and positive to work in. I know you want the best for your team and organization. I can help you to develop your EQ muscle. This enables you to create environments that people want to be in.